Divorce can be difficult and emotionally taxing for both parties going through the spit, but it’s best to handle the process with respect. This benefits you and your ex-partner and sets a positive example for any children involved. In this guide, we’ll walk you through how to handle divorce with dignity and cover essential tips for a respectful process.
Acknowledge Emotions
Divorce is an emotional time, and everything you feel is understandable, so allow yourself to sit with those emotions as you heal. You may feel anxious as you sort through piles of financial documents or frustrated that your marriage didn’t work out. Acknowledge your feelings and look into different methods of how you can manage and process your emotions during the divorce process.
Find Appropriate Outlets
Throughout your divorce, there may be days when you’re angry with the situation or sad about what could have been. This is natural, and finding healthy outlets can help you release these feelings. You could talk to a trusted friend or engage in an activity you love, such as running or journaling.
Avoid posting about your feelings or situation on social media, as this can negatively reflect your character in the divorce case. Moreover, if you have children, avoid discussing the case with them. Courts often take offensive posts and the behaviors of a party throughout the case seriously.
Pro Tip
All matters related to your divorce case should remain private. Aside from your attorney, you should discuss your case with only a few trusted friends/relatives and a therapist if applicable.
Avoid Placing Blame
It’s easy to play the blame game and feel that your anger, sadness, or anxiety is your ex’s fault, especially if they filed for divorce. The problem is that placing blame only adds to frustration and directs it toward your ex.
Similarly, you shouldn’t blame yourself for what happened. During a divorce proceeding, there isn’t a “right” or “wrong” party, and thinking this way increases your risk of making emotionally based decisions.
Take On an Outsider’s Perspective
Often, it’s easy for us to offer advice and support to others coping with a difficult situation, but when we’re struggling, our inner critic takes over. If you blame your ex or yourself, take a step back.
Ask yourself what you’d tell a friend dealing with the same situation. Chances are, you’d offer them support and compassion and remind them that with time, things will be OK. Tell this to yourself.
Take a Collaborative Approach
It’s always best to take a collaborative approach to your split when possible. By hiring a mediator, you and your soon-to-be ex can keep conversations out of the courtroom and have more power over the outcome of your situation.
Maintaining control over the divorce process also increases your chance of reaching a resolution with which you and the other party feel satisfied. Open negotiation can reduce your stress, making it easier to conduct yourself with dignity.
Communicate Openly
Moreover, remaining open to conversation and collaboration eases divorce for everyone involved. Holding on to anger and other negative emotions creates a more tense environment for yourself and everyone else involved.
If you feel safe and comfortable negotiating or discussing the terms of your divorce directly with your spouse, you may openly discuss your thoughts on splitting specific assets, alimony, child custody, and child support. For instance, if you feel that you and your ex should share child custody 50/50 because it’s in your child’s best interest, explain this.
Pro Tip
Discuss all your concerns and legal goals with your attorney before discussing them with your ex. Your lawyer can help you develop the ideal legal plan and advocate for your rights and your best interests.
Be Transparent
A collaborative divorce requires willful transparency regarding all matters. You should present all needed financial information and records as requested. If you or the other party refuses to cooperate, you may have to go down the traditional divorce route and allow a judge to make the decisions.
Hire a Team of Professionals
When you get divorced, you should hire a family law attorney who’s familiar with your state laws. This individual can guide you through the process, advise you on appropriate behavior methods, and offer support through this difficult time. Other professionals, such as a therapist, can help you cope with your emotions and plan for the next chapter in your life.
A Family Law Attorney
A family law attorney ensures a fair and smooth divorce process. They will handle all legal aspects of your case, including drafting and filing documents, negotiating with the other party’s lawyer, and representing you in court if necessary.
Jones Law Firm, PC
Jones Law Firm, PC, has knowledgeable and compassionate divorce attorneys in Denver, CO. Our team can assist with divorce in many areas, including alimony, child custody, property division, and more.
A Therapist
During a divorce, your mental health may be one of the last things you think about, but caring for your emotional well-being makes it easier to regulate how you feel.
Therapists specialize in various areas, so you’ll need to work with one best suited to your situation. If you feel anxious about the way your life will change, seek out a professional with expertise in divorce and anxiety.
Pro Tip
If you have children, work with a family counselor to guide them through the major changes in your family dynamic.
Don’t Involve the Kids
One of the most important tips for handling divorce with dignity and ensuring a respectful process is to keep your children out of the situation. Arguing with your ex in front of your children often leaves kids feeling stressed and uncomfortable. Likewise, speaking poorly of your ex in front of your children can leave them feeling conflicted.
Your divorce is between you and your ex, not your children. If you two will share custody, ensure you co-parent effectively and keep any disagreements away from the kids.
Why Behaving Matters
In addition to making the process easier for everyone, conducting yourself respectfully reduces the risk of Contempt of Court charges. A legal party may receive this charge if they act inappropriately or refuse to cooperate during a legal case.
Receiving a Contempt of Court charge can leave the guilty party with fines or jail time, depending on the circumstances. Moreover, this charge can work against you during specific aspects of your case, such as child custody.
Contact a Colorado Divorce Lawyer
During a divorce, you must hire an attorney who thoroughly understands your state’s family law system. Jones Law Firm, PC, has served Colorado for over 20 years and takes a hands-on approach with every client. Schedule your free consultation today to begin discussing your divorce case with our team.
