A lot of parenting time disputes don’t start in a courtroom. They start at a kitchen table, late at night, after the kids are finally asleep, with one parent staring at a proposed schedule the other side’s attorney drew up.
The schedule looks reasonable enough. Every other weekend, a couple of weeknight dinners, alternating holidays. There’s usually a message attached that says something like, let’s keep this simple and not put the kids through a fight. And part of you wants to sign it, because signing it would make the knot in your stomach go away.
But then you think, hey, is this actually what I’m entitled to? Are there other ways to do this? What does this schedule mean for me and my kids ten years from now, not just next week?
That question is the smart one. Listen to it. Here’s what I tell people who are sitting where you’re sitting.
What Parenting Time Actually Is
In Colorado, the law doesn’t say custody anymore. It says parental responsibilities, and it splits into two parts. One part is decision-making, which is who gets to make the big calls about school, medical care, religion, and therapy. I wrote about that one in a recent article on how joint decision-making works in practice. The other part is parenting time, which is the actual schedule. Who has the kids, and when.
Parenting time is the overnights you spend parenting your child. In plain terms, it’s the schedule that sets when your child is with each parent, including holidays, school breaks, and sometimes shorter blocks during the week. It’s who’s making breakfast on a Tuesday, who’s at the soccer game on Saturday, who has the kids on Christmas morning, and how your child moves between two homes for the rest of their childhood.
Colorado law, in C.R.S. 14-10-124, tells judges to decide parenting time based on the best interests of the child. There’s no automatic 50/50. There’s no thumb on the scale for moms or for dads. The court looks at your child’s age, their needs, their relationship with each of you, how settled they are in school, and whether the two of you can cooperate.
This article is one piece of the bigger picture of divorcing with children in Colorado. The full map, including decision-making, parenting time, child support, relocation, enforcement, and what happens after the decree, lives in our Divorce With Children overview, with a downloadable Divorce With Children ebook coming soon. This article stays on one dangerous moment: what a proposed parenting schedule really means before you sign it.
Parenting time also reaches past the calendar. The number of overnights each parent has can factor into child support, and the schedule shapes who drives to school, who covers the summer, and how each of you shows up in your child’s day-to-day life.
The Common Schedules, and What They Actually Feel Like
Five patterns show up over and over in Colorado parenting plans. None of them is automatically right. Each one feels different depending on how old your kids are and how well you and your ex can talk to each other.
Week-on, week-off. The kids spend a full week with you, then a full week with the other parent. Fewer handoffs, fewer goodbyes. Teenagers tend to do fine with it, because a week feels manageable to them. For a four-year-old, a week without one parent can feel like forever.
5-2-2-5. You have the kids Monday and Tuesday nights, every week. Your ex has them Wednesday and Thursday, every week. Then you alternate the Friday-through-Sunday weekend. Both of you get real weekday time, the kind where you’re helping with homework and packing lunches, not just doing the fun weekend stuff. The rhythm stays the same week to week, which younger kids like.
4-3-3-4. One of you has the first four nights, the other has the next three, and the next week it flips. Everybody gets a turn at the longer stretch and the shorter one. It works for school-age kids who can keep track of a slightly busier pattern.
Every other weekend with a midweek dinner. One parent has the kids most weeknights, the other gets every other weekend plus a Wednesday dinner or so. This is often the honest answer when one parent travels for work, has long hospital shifts, or lives far from the school.
Custom. When two parents actually talk to each other, the court will usually approve something built around your real life. Work three twelve-hour shifts? Match your parenting time to your days off. Blended family with stepkids in the mix? Build the exchanges around the whole household. Judges support creativity when both parents agree and the kids stay stable.
The schedule that’s perfect for your neighbor’s family might be wrong for yours. A plan that fits a thirteen-year-old won’t fit a four-year-old. A plan that works when you and your ex are civil will fall apart the first month if you’re not. The real question isn’t which schedule is best in general. It’s which one fits your kids and your actual week.
Holidays, Vacations, and the December Blow-Up
Holidays are where the calm weekly schedule goes out the window. Thanksgiving, winter break, spring break, the Fourth of July. These are the days families fight about, because these are the days that carry all the memories.
Colorado courts usually want you to alternate the big ones. You get Christmas Day in even years, your ex gets it in odd years. Thanksgiving flips back and forth. Spring break flips. Over time, your kids get traditions with both sides of the family.
Vacation time is usually built in too. Most plans give each parent a week or two of uninterrupted vacation a year, with some notice rules, some coordination on dates, and a requirement to share the travel plans so nobody’s left wondering where the kids are.
What a Judge Is Actually Looking At
If the two of you can’t agree, a judge decides. And a judge isn’t pulling a schedule out of a hat. They’re applying the best-interests factors in C.R.S. 14-10-124, and here’s what that looks like in real life.
Your child’s routine. The judge wants to know what your kid’s life looks like right now. How they’re doing in school. Who their friends are. What activities they’re in. A schedule that keeps a happy, settled kid on track is easier to defend than one that blows up a routine that’s already working.
Who’s actually been showing up. This is the big one. The judge wants to know who takes the kids to the doctor, who knows the teacher’s name, who was at the parent-teacher conference, who handles the bedtime routine and the homework. Not who says they’ll do it now that there’s a case. Who’s been doing it all along.
Whether the two of you can cooperate. Parents who can talk about the kids, who don’t trash each other, who keep the children out of the adult mess, do better. Parents who use the exchanges to pick fights, hold the kids back to make a point, or fire off ugly texts that end up printed as exhibits, lose ground.
Safety. If there’s a real history of domestic violence, substance abuse, or child abuse, everything changes. The court can limit time, require supervised exchanges, order treatment, or put other protections in place when there’s evidence behind the concern.
None of this is about picking a winner. The judge is building a structure your kids have to live inside for years, and every factor above feeds into that.
Common Questions About Parenting Time in Colorado
Do parenting time exchanges have to happen at each parent’s house?
No. You can hand off at a school, a daycare, or a public spot. When things are tense, a neutral location keeps the kids from watching the two of you square off.
Can young children do overnight parenting time?
Yes, when the handoffs are handled thoughtfully and both homes are stable. The court looks at your child’s attachment and developmental needs, not just the number on their last birthday cake.
Once a parenting plan is signed, is the schedule locked forever?
Not day to day. You and your ex can agree to swap a weekend, cover a school event, or handle a one-time conflict, and that’s normal when you’re cooperating and it’s good for the kids. But the real, lasting changes need to go through the court, so the written order matches your actual life. Don’t rely on a handshake for the big stuff.
Do Colorado judges only approve traditional schedules?
No. They approve creative ones all the time, as long as the plan fits the child and both parents are on board. A schedule built around your real life holds up better than one copied from somebody else’s.
Reach Out to a Parenting Time Lawyer Today
For the broader map, read this alongside what divorce with children in Colorado actually requires. Parenting time is only one part of the larger child-related structure, but it’s one of the parts families feel every single week.
If you’re staring at a proposed schedule right now and something about it feels off, that feeling is worth a conversation before you sign. Schedule a consultation with Jones Law Firm and let’s talk through where you actually stand.
April D. Jones is the Founder and CEO of Jones Law Firm, PC, a Colorado family law practice with offices in Greenwood Village, Denver, Aurora, Parker, Lakewood, and Westminster. She has practiced family law in Colorado for 25 years and has handled more than 4,000 family law matters. This article is general legal information, not legal advice. Every family law matter is different, and the application of Colorado law depends on the specific facts of each case.