Second Chances: Giving your ex a second shot while your divorce is pending
From time to time I will have a client call me a say something like:
“John and I were talking last night and we want to work on things and try to save our marriage, is that stupid?”
And my answer typically is something like:
“That is not stupid, that is great news!”
In my experience, this is not an unusual situation. It is understandable that when the reality of a divorce sets in, that the parties reevaluate their circumstances, and decide that maybe divorce isn’t the answer for their family.
The State of Colorado also encourages parties’ to work on the marriage, even once a divorce is already pending. Pursuant to C.R.S. 14-10-112(2)(b) the law provides that :
“the Court may continue the matter for further hearing not less than thirty days nor more than sixty days later, or as soon thereafter as the matter may be reached on the court’s calendar, and may suggest to the parties that they seek counseling.”
In my experience I find that although the statute limits the continuance to 60 days, that typically the Court is willing to continue (or essentially pause) the divorce proceeding for 90 days so that the parties may attempt to reconcile their marriage. This gives the parties an opportunity to either (1) work things out and drop the divorce, or (2) determine that reconciliation is not appropriate and proceed with their divorce.
In sum, don’t be afraid to try to work things out. It is possible to keep the divorce pending and try to reconcile all at the same time!